I Know My Place!

Construction is a funny business because at each stage of the build different trades come and go but I have noticed a bit of friction between the various trades - a bit of class war you might say.  Reminds me of the infamous John Cleese sketch with Ronnie Corbett and Ronnie Barker "I know my place".

In fact this photo also reminded of the sketch too....alas it's all in the mind.

Still good to see that Derek and Pauls crew work really well together and the banter is...well...unprintable when I've got kids tuning into this blog too!  Anyway it's a good laugh listening to it and certainly brightens up an otherwise dull day.

Work is now pressing ahead to get the entire roof structure covered with breathable roofing felt to provide a degree of weather-proofing.  The membrane allows the internal roof structure to breath yet does not allow water molecules to pass through it - thereby keeping the roof timbers dry but allowing air to circulate preventing them from rotting - very clever stuff.

You can see from the shot above how complex the roof structure design really is as this aspect of the structure is hidden from view by the roof tiles and internal plaster boarding.  This design is called trussed rafters and basically is built around triangles given this shape offers the greatest load-bearing capacity.  It is the cheapest design but precludes me from converting the loft into an attic room at a later date.  This option would require an alternative attic rafter design that creates an internal boxed shape within the roof void enabling the installation of a relatively regular shaped room within the roof space.  Naturally this design costs the most.  Having designed a four-bedroomed house with Study I firstly couldn't afford the extra cost on budget and wanted to stick to my philosophy of "keep it simple stupid".

The above pictures show the internal view of one of the back bedrooms and the smaller front guest bedroom. You can just about make out that the roof slopes down to floor level at the rear of the rooms so headroom is limited but that end of the room is ideal for the beds - it adds a quirky element to the overall design and besides the kids love irregular and different rooms - provides novelty - at least whilst they aren't fully grown!

Now that we've got the roof felt and battens on we have to wait for delivery of the roof tiles - I'm surprised at the poor delivery track record of most suppliers in the building game - wouldn't tolerate that in IT - we just wouldn't turn up - period!

He Ain't Heavy...He's Derek

A man like Derek needs something to reflect his image - I've got a lovely Skoda in the forecourt if you're interested?  Still the personalised number plate must be keeping the value on the van...you are long overdue a new work-horse.

Still things have progressed really well whilst I was on holiday with the main roof timber structure now installed it's suddenly starting to look like a normal house now!

I arrived back from holiday just in time to capture the finishing touches to the gable end as Kerry and Paul neatly brought the stone work up to the right height to take the battens, slates and water tables (more about these in a future post).

In the snap here Kerry is making the most of the sunny weather I brought back from Spain after one of the wettest weeks since the project started - quite literally what a difference a week makes.

I couldn't resist this photo opportunity though - "a reet proper action shot!" as Kerry would say.  Sorry Paul but he was showing off and you were not at all impressed - health and safety and all that but the final product is worth all the show-boating regardless....

It's goodnight from me...

...well at least until I get back from my jollies so there will be no more posts this next week.

"Don't worry about a thing", "enjoy yourself", "have a great time", "I'll only phone you in an emergency", "We'll still be here - even if your house isn't" were some of the well wishes and back slapping we got from the building-duo of Derek and Paul as we got ready to leave for a week in Majorca - OMG!!!!

It's been a strange week this week.  Not much seems to have happened on the externals given we're now waiting for the roof timbers to arrive next week.  Having said this I've learnt a lot.  Like...

• Derek is always right - the sparky did come in at £3,500
• that Paul's dog, Ty STINKS, REAL BAD
• Paddy will always come second in a fight with a JCB
• that James works 100 times harder than anyone else FACT
• Kez loses everything he has at least once every day
• that you can't fit a quart into a pint pot
• Derek never admits he's wrong EVER
• we need to install time-lapse photography to see Mick move!
• I really couldn't leave my new house in safer hands and
• I shouldn't believe everything builders say ;¬)

I've also been looking at the website traffic recently so here's some useless stats...

• There have been 130 unique visitors who have read my blog since it started.
• On average 50 visitors per week tune in to catch up on progress (or lack of).
• Each visitor reads an average of 3 pages each visit - this varies based on how many new entries I post!
• Internet Explorer is by far the most popular browser with 80% of you using it.
• 16% use Google Chrome (myself included).
• You spend on average 5 min and 37 sec on the site - although I suspect 7 sec is spent reading and the remainder in a coma!
• 74% of you visit the site at least 2 times per week.
• Sky Broadband, BT OpenReach, Carphone Warehouse, Easynet and IP Pools(?) are the most common service providers you appear to be using - between the 130 unique visitors you use 25 service providers!
• You visit my blog as follows - 65% directly by typing the URL, 25% from referring sites such as FaceBook and Linked-In etc. and 10% from search engines with Google topping the list by miles.
• I have earned between £5 and £50 from advertisement revenue and click-thru's via AdSense.
• Apporximately 69% of all Internet content consists of pornography -  and I haven't even got a pornograph!

Anyroada I gotta fly (quite literally) but before I do I just have this little jokette to do. 

What is it that a man does standing up, a woman sitting down, and a dog on three legs? 

It's shaking hands! What else could it be? 

I'm off now so pop your cork!

Street Scene

Not that I was out walking the dog the other day but I wanted to see what the house looked like from the different vantage points around my neighbourhood (or street scene as the planning officers at the local council refer to it).

I'd like to think we're conscientious developers - after all this house is going to be around long after I'm "deed" and I wanted to leave behind a legacy to be proud of.  All too often I see houses squeezed into patio pots with little regard for the impact on the environment and local amenities.

Anyway strolling around the looking decidedly "dodgy" taking photos from different angles I didn't get arrested thankfully but what I did get was a pleasant surprise to see the structure emerging from the trees.

I personally think that the surrounding forna  perfectly masks the bulk and mass of the building and provides interest and curiosity for passers-by.

Maybe it will look somewhat different (harsher perhaps) in the winter months once the trees have shed their leaves but for now it will do for me!

Anyway I don't have time to admire the handy work of Derek and Paul for long - yet more decision to be made - and the pressing one right now is the primary heating source - after a major panic over whether we had left sufficient room for underfloor heating - we accounted for 80mm of insulation + 55mm of screed + 15mm for oak flooring - we finally received confirmation that the underfloor heating pipework would fit snugly within the 55mm of concrete floor screed.  Had our calculations (or the suppliers specification) been any different our finished floor levels would have resulted in small steps (height differences) between each doorway threshold - an ugly and costly mistake - fortunately avoided.

Still I could have done without the stress - thanks Derek - and thanks Paul for remaining calm whilst everyone else lost it for a while.  I'll post more information on underfloor heating - it's a heat sensation - it's the future!

The third Wise Man arriveth...

...after many weeks of travel the third wise man (actually Duncan my architect) finally arrives to complete a modern take of the infamous biblical scene - "And lo, the brickies were abiding their walls by night"!

Having worked on the technical drawings I think Duncan was pleasantly surprised how well the build had progressed in such a short time and finally could see in all it's glory the mass and "flow through" of the layout.  Naturally there were things that stood out, which on reflection could have been crafted and disguised a little better in the fabric of the design - the sort of things that only become apparent at this late stage.

Never-the-less the wise men came bearing gifts - one of which was a "fake arrow slot" solid -stone carved block feature to adorn the gable end (the pointy bit of walling at the front of the house directly above the bay window).  It seems to be traditional to put something within the triangular void to break up the stone walling.

Naturally I wanted to be the one to lay this feature stone so that in years to come I can say "I put that stone in" - a bit of history in the making.  Kez said that I should put in a "Date Stone" instead so people will know when the house was built - in fact he did say that Naylor Myers the local builders merchant had a good selection of  "2010"s.

Now I'm not saying that I'm tight or anything but the thought did cross my mind to leave a whole in the wall until the New Year...at which point I would then go to the builders merchant and ask for a discount on the "2010" date stone given that it would then be a year out of date - a bit like the change of car registration plates!  Besides it would help the budget position just a tad.

Well I'm pleased with the end result all the same!

I'm also very pleased with the chimney that Paul built for me on the fly using the odds and sods of stone we had left over from the quoins.  Believe it or not there is a lot more work involved in building a chimney than I had ever imagined - made all the more difficult by having the chimney breast and stack on the INSIDE of the building rather than on the external wall.  I'm not sure if this makes it more efficient in terms of heat loss though?

We now have the external walls erected to wall plate level.  Wall plate level is the final wall height on which the roof structure sits and the wall plates are pieces of timber screwed and fixed securely to the internal walls so that the roof literally does not blow off!  We've ordered all of the roof timbers/trusses and these should be on site w/c 19th July - the week I'm on holiday - so by the time I get back I hope to post some more photos of the roof structures and tiles.  Thank god I'm only away for a week - still the weather seems to have reverted back to the seasonal norm for the UK.

I really could have done with another week of dry weather to at least get the roof timbers up, battened and felted to keep the rain out.  Hope the forecast for next week isn't all rain because roofing is a dangerous occupation at the best of times - least of all when it's tipping it down!

Three Wise Men

Well I couldn't afford the third wise man so I had to make do with Dexter (Dereks new nickname from my kids) and Mick-the-Mick (he's browner than a chocolate brownies).  Derek is the one in blue and Mick is modelling a little dusty salmon pink number.

I'm not sure what they are doing (HSE - the kick-board has been removed temporarily whilst the stone was lifted into position before being replaced shortly after this photo) - probably putting the world to rights or they could have been "checking levels" again - that's all they seem to do all day - still it's better than smoking.

We are now on week SIX of the project and the costs are starting to fly in thick and fast now - all we seem to be doing is taking deliveries and paying through the nose - scary stuff really.

Anyway I won't bore you to death - time to just kick back and look at the pictures.  Oh and by the way for all those of you who have been emailing asking why I haven't posted on FB recently well aside from being busy at work, the news feed from this blog to FB has stopped working - dunno why I didn't code it - but what I suggest you do is bookmark this blog and keep dropping in every week. TTFN.

Oh and just before you go the next photo really does start to show how the finished house will look from the front drive (which can be seen on the right in the next picture).

Scaffolding Arrives

Dunno about you but I have never given scaffolding much thought until I got the bill - £2,000 for an 8 week hire. Well call me cynical but where else can you get that sort of money for erecting the scaffold in a day then leaving at the customers site until finished at which point you spend another day dismantling and moving to the next paying customers site.  No storage costs, no maintenance (it don't rust believe me).

Anyroada just thought I'd get the obligatory scaffolding joke (er the only scaffolding joke I have ever heard come to think of it)...

Steve, Bob, and Jeff were working on a very high scaffolding one day when suddenly, Steve falls off and is killed instantly. After the ambulance leaves with Steve's body, Bob and Jeff realize that one of them is going to have to tell Steve's wife.

Bob says he's good at this sort of sensitive stuff, so he volunteers to do the job. After two hours he returns, carrying a six-pack of beer.

"So did you tell her?" asks Jeff.

"Yep", replied Bob.

"Say, where did you get the six-pack?"

Bob informs Jeff. "She gave it to me!"

"What??" exclaims Jeff, "you just told her her husband died and she gave you a six-pack??"

"Sure," Bob says.

"Why?" asks Jeff.

"Well," Bob continues, "when she answered the door, I asked her, 'are you Steve's widow?'

'Widow?', she said, 'no, no, you're mistaken, I'm not a widow!'

So I said: "I'll bet you a six-pack you ARE!'"

 I make nnnooo apologies for that - it's just so sick and so lame - bottom of the barrel.  OK I hear you are repulsed so let me share with you this little gem from Scaffold Safely a monthly publication for those...well...errr into their scaffold I guess?

Seriously though the scaffold has finally arrived ready for first lift - a term used to describe the height at which the builder has to physically start lifting materials above head height.  It is erected in sections and completely surrounds the ground floor walls now.  Derek keeps stressing to me now that the scaffold is here things will start to slow down simply because they have to first get the materials up to the top of the scaffolding before the brickies can start walling again - and he means literally everything from tools, cement, blocks and stone - the lot has to be hand-balled up each level (or lift).  The scaffolding also gets erected in sections as the house rises up, level by level.

Still it's good to see that my youngest find a use for the scaffold - as a ballet bar - before promptly being told off and lectured of the dangers.  Fortunately for everyone the scaffold had only just been erected that day and there were no foot boards or materials on it.  KIDS!!!